I got my A$$ whooped

In my travels to assist my little New Mexico Family in their move back home, I contracted the flu.  You know that flu epidemic that has been running rampant in the United States...yeah, that's the one.

I am here to tell you that I, in my 53 years of breathing in and out, cannot recall ever being that sick.  What a helpless, hopeless feeling, to go to the doctor on Day 5 - sporting 2 day old jammies and 3 day old bed hair, only to be told, "There's nothing we can do."  No relief, gotta let it run it's course.  Oh but wait, here's a 'script for breathing treatments, $100.  Maybe the doc should have told me that those treatments would make every muscle in my body knot up at the exact same time.  Doubt if I can get those monies back, but I'll not be doing anymore of those treatments.

No energy to do anything but moan and groan.  Coughing my fool head off producing nothing.  Couldn't lay down because that led to coughing...sitting up was no better, of course.  I didn't eat anything for 6 days.  I tried, my stomach was completely empty, grinding against itself...but nothing sounded good or tasted like it should.

Then Sweetheart developed a cough, a deep, rumbly cough, producing more phlegm than a human body should be allowed. Of course he didn't say anything, but I know he blamed me for his illness. I'm not a happy, nice sick person to begin with.  I cry (which leads to coughing), I feel sorry for myself, and I am so cranky I can't stand myself.

He's a stubborn old coot, continuing to perform his household chores and to take Young Son to work, as well as going to the grocery store (yes, he's one of those that goes when he is sick, sharing the "goodness"), even though Darling Danielle was full well able and capable to do the shopping for him.  These chores were performed, then related to me in the most forlorn way, as if I didn't know that he had just ran the sweeper.  I'm sick, not deaf!

Add to the mix my big feline, Nurse PorkChop, who feels it is his duty to lay as close to me as possible when I am not feeling well.  And a Chihuahua that hogs the heating pad.

Sweetheart finally went to the doctor, who determined that he in fact did not have the flu (by jamming a long Q-tip up his sinus cavity, the description of this activity was about the only thing that made me smile throughout this ordeal), but that his Bronchitis had flared.  He was prescribed antibiotics.  This convinced him that I did not have the flu, but Bronchitis, and that my doctor had bamfoozled me into thinking I had the flu.  ???

I can't tell you how angry this made me.  If I had had any strength in my noodle of a carcass at that point, I might have raised my voice to him, but since I didn't, I rolled my eyes, went to bed and cried, which lead to more coughing...endless cycle.  I took to calling him "Mr. Antibiotic" in my head, I was so jealous that he had prescribed relief coming his way.

Day 10 of the flu, I was able to sit up in a chair for half a day.  That wore me out.  I was able to eat some green beans.

Day 11 spent in bed, actually able to lay down and nap a few times.  Day 12 - showered, put on clean jammies, and sat up most of the day, wandered around the house a few times, ate some more green beans...

The next day I went back to work.  That was yesterday.  Valentine's Day.  No lovey dovey hearts and flowers for me, just cooking burgers for card players and cleaning the men's room that hadn't been cleaned in 3 weeks.

Today I am at work again, not sure why, as the guys brought candy and cookies in for them to snack on, after specifically asking if I was coming in today to cook for them.  I have on a sweater, and a quilted shirt, making quite the fashion statement to be sure...I have a lingering cough, which is a normal thing after this flu.  After a few coughs this morning one of them cheerily asked me, "Are you alright back there?" which was followed by uproarious laughter from around the card table.  Seriously?  I should have come back 3 days earlier, and infected all you Jesters, huh?  You think this is funny?  Here, let me lick your spoon before I give it to you.

Play Nice!  (Do as I say, not as I do, at least for right now.)
xxoo