Is it Over?

Small Backstory:

In December of 2021, the man I had lived with for two decades pointed a gun at  me and threatened to kill me.

This was after years of emotional abuse, and it had ramped up considerable in the weeks leading up to this.

He spent 4 nights in jail, and I ran away.  

I was homeless for over a year.  I finally have a place of my own, and am ready to retrieve my belongings I had to leave behind when I ran.  

This Saturday is the day.  I have a truck rented, volunteers (since I am not allowed to be present...but I couldn't have gone anyway) at the ready.  I am a nervous wreck, so afraid something will go wrong before then.  

I have had zero communication with him since that night.  He's so afraid of everything, while acting like he's all that.  Puny little tiny sick man.  

Friday, March 24, 2023

I am waiting to go into town to sign said papers and pick up a u-haul.  Oh my word, I am nervous.  So close, so close to being done with that.  Hopefully now the nightmares with cold sweats will dissipate.'

He hasn't tried to contact me once.  Which is great, I am not sad about that.  My point is now there will be zero reason for him to contact me.  I won't be constantly on the lookout for him when I go to town.  He will no longer have anything over me  Wow...

It's been a long time.  A r.e.a.l.l.y long time.  The sad thing is that he wasn't always like this, it's just his demons finally took over his brain.  

I have so much I want to say to him.  In a letter.  I want to list out all my woes and sorrows and put the blame on him but you know what?  It wouldn't stick.  He'd take it to the golf course and read it out loud for the boys under the Beer Tree.  

So, instead.  I think I'll just write him a letter that says, "I forgive you."

Gotta go!  

To be Continued...

xxoo