Telling the Truth

 Lately, I have been spending a lot of time in my brain thinking about my life.  Still hard to wrap my head around my mom passing away at the age I am now.  

My life has gotten to it's final chapter.  Not that I'm dying anytime soon, it's just that I have less time left than I ever have had before.  I am becoming an elder, and with that comes certain responsibilities that have been bestowed upon me by age and the wisdom that comes with it.

At the same time, my life has began a brand new chapter.  One that I have dreamed about and wished for my entire life.  

Disclaimer:  I loved living with my kids as they were growing up.  It was just the 3 of us for a long time, and that was the best!  

Having my own place.  Living alone.  Like my Grandma Baker did.  I spent a few Summers with her, she didn't drive, we didn't do anything special, no crafts or museums or shopping...we worked in the garden, we washed our hair with water from the cistern, we went to bed when the chickens did (always washed our feet first) and got up when they did, too.  

Anyway...

Telling the Truth.  Big Responsibility.  And it's a grand and glorious thing when a person can speak the truth to someone that needs to hear it, actually hears it.

Because sometimes, most times, when the Truth blurts out of my face, or through my fingers, I feel like the messenger.  Like, someone had to say it, even though to me, it's right there...it should be obvious...but I also know from personal experience that everyone also have their own set of blinders on.  What's perfectly visible to some is invisible to others, I guess?  I don't know all the answers.

Facing the Truth has its own set of stages, usually each of them is difficult.  Because facing it means to look at it from all angles, not just an emotional one.  It means trying to see it from a different perspective.  Maybe even remove yourself from it and see it as an outsider...I don't know all these answers, either.

I'm learning.  I am teaching, and I know things I didn't use to know.

I see a young mommy with her babies at the grocery store, and I smile at her and say something encouraging to her,  they won't always be so little.  I see Grandmas with their g-kids, and I know they know.  I see an older woman with one of her parents, helping them shop, and I want to hug her and tell her how lost she will be when this one is gone, too, just so she will see just how precious each and every moment she gets to spend with them is, but I just smile at both of them, because I know.  And she will, too, soon enough.  

That's probably enough for today.  I have a new burning I want to get started on.  It's gray and chilly outside, supposed to rain, it's a good day to stay in.  

Play Nice!  xxoo

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